- Commie Super Apes Are Our Superiors: It has been uncovered that Josef Stalin wanted to breed half man/half ape soldiers.
- Researchers have determined that Beethoven died of lead poisoning. There goes my "bungee jump gone horribly amiss" theory.
- Scientists use emotion recognition software to determine that the famed Mona Lisa was 83% happy, 9% disgusted, 6% fearful, and 2% angry in her portrait. I 100% don't really care.
Interesting comment about the Stalinist super-apes. I was just at dinner having a discussion about how, just to pi$$ off some people, we should begin referring to China by the name "Red China" again.
ReplyDeleteUh, I never stopped referring to China as that.
ReplyDeletepshhh.
ReplyDeletewho isn't "83% happy, 9% disgusted, 6% fearful, and 2% angry?"