Sunday, March 02, 2014

"And the Oscar goes to... Grown Ups 2!"

It's time once again for that glitzy Hollywood circle jerk commonly called the Oscars. As I have no DVR, I have a painful conflict: this airs at the same time as The Walking Dead. Do I watch a horrifying portrait of an eroding society controlled by a mass of decaying ghouls? Or do I watch my zombie stories? I guess I'll tune in to the silly awards show. Who will take home the top prize? A tragic tale of being lost in space ("12 Years a Slave"), the story of a lonely man falling in love with his phone ("Captain Phillips"), a brutal examination of America's racist past ("Philomena")? Maybe one of the other nominated films that'll show up on Netflix in six or seven years?

I haven't seen any of the films nominated in the big categories. I know, I know. I'm really behind. So having no knowledge on the merits of the honored movies, it's all speculation on my part. I'm going to say that, oh I don't know, that latest Thor flick sweeps the night.

And then there's the fashion! I have no interest in any of that hoo-ha! For those that do, though, I'll say that tonight I'm wearing a shirt by Pierre Marvel, pants by Anton de la Nautica, and slippers by Kohl's Store Brand.

As I do every year, I'll be live blogging in the comments section of this post. Why don't you come on in and join me? The snark is strong in you. I can feel it.