Like kittens? Like Vikings? Like Zeppelin?

Then you'll love this. I used to think of Jack Black in School of Rock when I heard that song. Not anymore.

Credit due: Spydrz

Crush of the Week: Anna Benson

This week's Crush is freaky baseball wife Anna Benson. New York's loss is Baltimore's gain. Kind of makes you proud to be an Orioles fan.


Batter...Batter...Schwing!

Admittedly, I didn't put much thought into this week's Crush. It's a beautiful spring day and I'm preoccupied with packing (among other things). She is on the cover of the latest issue of FHM laying nearby. So, there you go.

Pencils down.

I just finished taking VH1's Pop Culture I.Q. Test. If the bar exam required copious amounts of useless knowledge gained from years of reading "Entertainment Weekly", watching E! and VH1, and scanning internet message boards, I'd already have made partner in Crane, Poole & Schmidt.

Statistically, I don't think I answered enough questions correctly to be in the fifth percentile, which makes you eligible to participate in "The World Series of Pop Culture" (why did I choose "Anthony Edwards" when the answer was "Timothy Busfield"?). They don't give you your results, but I think I scored somewhere between 80% and 90%. Hopefully, a "Best Week Ever" producer will happen upon my scores and offer me a job.

If you missed out on the 7 p.m. exam, you can still take it at 10 p.m. EST.

Hump Day News Round-Up

• A husband murdered a woman by suffocating her with a ceramic decorative plate. The Franklin Mint says that previous plates used in homicides have been known to increase over 200% in value (not a guarantee).
  
• Hooters Air goes tits up.
  
• An armless New Zealand man was stopped for speeding. Dude, he's got no arms. Give him a break.
  
• Americans' use of profanity is on the rise. Well, no shit.

Bye Bye, Bluths

It's official: "Arrested Development" is dead.


COME ON!

Sad news, but at least it went out before its quality started to decline. Also nice that most of the plotlines were wrapped up nicely.

Now we can all concentrate on "The Office".

Lightning bolt! Lightning bolt! Sleep! Death!

Whenever life gets you down, Mrs. Brown, just be thankful you aren't like these guys. I saw this video a few years ago and I couldn't stop laughing. I figured it had to be on YouTube and sure enough...

(I realize that appropriating a Monty Python song makes me geeky, but at least I don't do live action RPGs.)

Colbert meets Kareem

Check out this video of Stephen Colbert's Hiphopketball 2: Rejazzabration Remix 06 (the sequel to Hiphopketball: A Jazzabration). The sight of Colbert and Kareem Abdul-Jabaar together cracks me up. When Jimmy Fallon was on SNL, I gave him crap for ALWAYS busting character, but for some reason, I find it funny when Colbert does it.

For those who see a trend of me using Colbert videos as blog filler, A) you're right and B) he's hilarious.

99 Luftballons on the wall, 99 luftballons...

VH1 Classic will be airing Nena's "99 Luftballons"/"99 Red Balloons" video continuously for an hour today at 2 p.m. EST. Strange, but it's for charity.

For $35k (the amount of the donation), I could think of other videos that I'd want to see on a loop: Warrant's "Cherry Pie" comes to mind.

Quick movie reviews

Shopgirl: Steve Martin goes dramatic a la Bill Murray. And I loved it.
The Chronicles of Narnia: the Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe: I've never read the C.S. Lewis stories, so I went into this erotic thriller fresh and was thoroughly entertained. Aslan's supposed to represent Buddha, right?
V for Vendetta: Didn't love it. Didn't hate it. 99% of the time Hugo Weaving's V speaks behind a non-moving mask, which reminded me of the silliest part of Spider-Man (when Spidey and the Green Goblin have their conversation).
In Good Company: I meant to review this last year when I first caught it on DVD. It was completely mismarketed as a romantic comedy. The movie's actually about the conflict between an aging magazine exec and his much younger boss. You should see it simply because it stars Scarlett Johansson (which is a good enough reason to see any movie of hers).
Running Scared: VERY brutal, but entertaining. It contains one of the biggest "WTF?!" twists that I've ever seen. The best review comes from comedian Patton Oswalt:

"I saw RUNNING SCARED last week. Although I don't exactly feel like I 'saw' it. I feel like it yelled at me for two hours and the crushed by balls with a can of baked beans.

Is it playing near you? Better run out and see it. 'Cuz it ain't gonna be playing much longer. RUNNING SCARED, as a film, feels like it was written by the idea of anal trauma, filmed by un-lubed rape, and directed by the smell of a pedo-priest's death poo.

Have I mentioned I loved it?"

(Check the link for a funny anecdote about a couple that walked out of the movie.)

Choose my dinner

While you are mulling over what to name the dog, you can help me decide what to fix for dinner: She-Crab Soup, Clam Chowder, or Crab Norfolk.

Leave your choice in the comment section by 7:00 pm. Whichever one receives a plurality of votes I'll make for dinner.

This dog needs a name

MW commenters Shamrock and KPMD will soon be hearing the pitter-patter of little paws around their new house. They were approved to be parents of a rescued male hound/pit mix and will be receiving him this Saturday.

They requested that you, dear readers, come up with a name for the lil' guy. Leave your entries in the comments section for this post and, if there is one that they like, they will use it. The person who comes up with the winning name will be awarded a meal at Chik-Fil-A or, if he/she cannot make it to the Philadelphia area, a gift certificate to the fast food restaurant of the winner's choosing. The contest will be open until Wednesday, March 29, 2006.

The couple reserves the right to name the dog themselves if no suitable entry is provided.

He wishes he was as talented as Shaq Diesel

Now a Cowboy, T.O. has seen fit to record a hip-hop song (right click-save as). Ugh.

In other (more talented) music band news, here is a streaming video of the Flaming Lips performing "Bohemian Rhapsody" at SXSW. Boy, does that look like a fun show (it would've been nice if the audio was taken from the soundboard, but you take what you can get).

Also on that page is a link to the new K-Fed song, but I haven't ventured there yet. Radio won't even play his jam.

Credit due: I snagged all of the above links from the Relevant magazine site.

Crushes of the Week: mid-90's ska chicks

This week's Crushes are mid-90's ska chicks. In my neverending task of uploading music to my iPod, I was recently reminded of a musical trend that I used to be into during my college years: female-fronted ska groups.



Above are the women of No Doubt (Gwen Stefani), Dance Hall Crashers (Elyse Rogers and Karina Denike), and Save Ferris (Monique Powell). And although not the band's singer, I also had a thing for Five Iron Frenzy saxophonist Leanor Ortega (hard to find a good-sized pic of her).

Hump Day News Round-Up

• The Hell's Angels are suing Disney for trademark infringement in the movie studio's upcoming Tim Allen/John Travolta film Wild Hogs. The group is seeking compensatory damages in the form of - I am not making this up - 400 cases of Miller Genuine Draft and some "really sticky bud".
  
• Airlines lost 30 million bags in 2005. Luckily, mine wasn't among them.
  
• Susan Sarandon will portray Cindy Sheehan in an upcoming movie about the anti-war (among other things) activist. I am SHOCKED!
  
• You're born: Donald Trump sires another child.
  
• Richard Dreyfuss got married. This is notable (for me, at least) because the impromptu event occurred while he was in Harrisonburg, VA, for a speaking engagement at my sister's alma mater - James Madison University.
  
• A Utah man has been arrested for allegedly using dog shock collars to discipline his children. Sure, it's cruel, but I don't think the kids are pooping on the rug anymore.

If today is the second day of spring...

...then why does it look like pre-war Narnia* outside my window?

*Hyperbole, yes. But it's freakin' March.

The Burger King: terrorist or patriot?

"The kids don't wanna hear some weirdo book that your Nazi war criminal grandma read to you."

Some great news for fans of "The Office": this summer NBC will produce 10 internet-only episodes of the Best Comedy on Television (hey, I lurve "Arrested Development", but facts is facts).

And if you didn't catch it, last week's episode - "Take Your Daughter To Work Day" - was freakin' hilarious. Go to iTunes and buy it. Or download it illegally.

"Listen, I like kids. But this is not a kid's environment, this is like HBO. No limits. Who knows what I'm going to say? Crazy stuff. And it is R-rated. It is not rated G. I am like Eddie Murphy in 'Raw', and they are trying to make me into Eddie Murphy in 'Daddy Day Care'. Both great movies, but still."

---

"Kelly and I both agreed that we would both have fun, and I'm learning that fun for Kelly is getting married and having babies. Immediately. With me."

Micah World Top 25

Here they are, the top 25 songs burning up my iPod (as of 3.18.06):

1. "Knock Yourself Out" - Jon Brion
2. "All the Pretty Girls Leave Town" - Tim Easton
3. "Jesusland" - Ben Folds
4. "Bad Things" - Jace Everett
5. "Absolutely Cuckoo" - The Magnetic Fields
6. "Why Don't You Get a Job" - The Offspring
7. "Lua" - Bright Eyes
8. "Death Valley Queen" - Flogging Molly
9. "Tribulations" - LCD Soundsystem
10. "Rational Bohemian" - Mary Prankster
11. "Troublesome Kind" - Tim Easton
12. "Mr. Bad Example" - Warren Zevon
13. "War on Drugs" - Barenaked Ladies
14. "Don't Ask Me Why" - Billy Joel
15. "Fall Back Down" - Candy Butchers
16. "Devil's Pie" - D'Angelo
17. "Kiss Me I'm Shitfaced" - Dropkick Murphys
18. "Goodbye Yellow Brick Road" - Elton John
19. "Do It Better" - Happy Mondays
20. "Goodnight Goodnight" - Hot Hot Heat
21. "You Are What You Love" - Jenny Lewis with the Watson Twins
22. "Goth Girl" - John Wesley Harding
23. "William and Nancy's Parting" - John Wesley Harding
24. "Cocaine Blues" - Johnny Cash
25. "A.D.I.D.A.S." - Korn

There were a couple of position shifts and new additions from the last count.

"That's not a shillelagh!"*

Happy St. Patrick's Day! Go out and enjoy corned beef, cabbage, and Lucky Charms.



Just try to keep the drinking in check, lest you end up looking like Shane MacGowan.

*Alternative post title: "Erin Go Bra-less"

Scientologists have no sense of humor (part 875)

The ever nutty Tom Cruise has stepped into the Isaac Hayes/"South Park" flap. Comedy Central was supposed to rerun the Scientology episode of the show this past Wednesday, but didn't. Cruise reportedly went to Viacom and threatened to withdraw from promoting its upcoming Mission Impossible 3 film if the episode aired. Viacom caved and ordered Matt Stone and Trey Parker not to discuss why the episode was yanked.

But the "South Park" guys issued this statement: "So, Scientology, you may have won THIS battle, but the million-year war for earth has just begun! Temporarily anozinizing our episode will NOT stop us from keeping Thetans forever trapped in your pitiful man-bodies. Curses and drat! You have obstructed us for now, but your feeble bid to save humanity will fail! Hail Xenu!!! - Trey Parker and Matt Stone, servants of the dark lord Xenu."

Oh, man. That is classic.