Thursday, June 05, 2008

Requisites: Summertime Movies

Movies are a great way to beat the heat if you want to get out yet stay in a climate-controlled atmosphere. I remember being in Puerto Rico one summer and, since the house we stayed at didn't have AC, we'd go out to the supermarket or movies to keep cool (there's nothing like watching Crimson Tide with Spanish subtitles). So, if you want to check out what's happening in theaters this summer, I'll steer you towards my Summer Movie Checklist. I'll just add that, of the films yet to be released on that list, I'm probably most psyched about The Incredible Hulk, with Step Brothers a close second. Wanna make something of it? You wouldn't like me when I'm angry.

But, through the miracle of DVD, you can beat the heat and revel in it at the same time.

Die Hard, Die Hard with a Vengeance, Live Free or Die Hard With the exception of the snowy Christmas in DC of Die Harder, this is one sweaty, dirty action series. John McClain gets all grimy so you don't have to.

Wet Hot American Summer I don't think anyone was clamoring for a parody of early 80s summer camp movies, but this is spot-on. "You taste like a burger. I don't like you anymore."

Donovan's Reef John Wayne. Lee Marvin. Tropical setting. Need I say more?

Jaws For better or worse, this ushered in the summer blockbuster season as we know it. Even with a phony-baloney mechanical shark, this film is nothing short of brilliant.

South Pacific I'm not big on musicals, but I have a thing for this one, mainly because I'd listen to the soundtrack while writing papers in college. Even if you can't get past the standard musical cheesiness, just mute it and take in the wonderful scenery.

Ocean's Eleven, Twelve, & Thirteen Believe me, Vegas in the summer months is nigh-unbearable (not sure about Europe, as I've only been a winter/spring traveler). So, sit back and watch the heists and marvel at how these cool cats stay so fresh-looking. Movie magic!

The Good, the Bad and the Ugly Because you have to have a western, you might as well watch the best. Just be glad you're not choking on the dust of Spain, er the Old West.


spydrz said...

I think you're gonna need a bigger boat.

Anonymous said...

Thank you for mentioning South Pacific, because that was the trigger I needed to remember the dream I had last night, where my friend and I led our French class in singing "Dites-moi" at the mall.

Micah said...

Two can play the quote game...*ahem*:

Japanese submarine slammed two torpedoes into our side, Chief. We was comin' back from the island of Tinian to Leyte... just delivered the bomb. The Hiroshima bomb. Eleven hundred men went into the water. Vessel went down in 12 minutes. Didn't see the first shark for about a half an hour. Tiger. 13-footer. You know how you know that when you're in the water, Chief? You tell by looking from the dorsal to the tail. What we didn't know, was our bomb mission had been so secret, no distress signal had been sent. They didn't even list us overdue for a week. Very first light, Chief, sharks come cruisin', so we formed ourselves into tight groups. You know, it was kinda like old squares in the battle like you see in the calendar named "The Battle of Waterloo" and the idea was: shark comes to the nearest man, that man he starts poundin' and hollerin' and screamin' and sometimes the shark go away... but sometimes he wouldn't go away. Sometimes that shark he looks right into ya. Right into your eyes. And, you know, the thing about a shark... he's got lifeless eyes. Black eyes. Like a doll's eyes. When he comes at ya, doesn't seem to be living... until he bites ya, and those black eyes roll over white and then... ah then you hear that terrible high-pitched screamin'. The ocean turns red, and despite all the poundin' and the hollerin', they all come in and they... rip you to pieces. You know by the end of that first dawn, lost a hundred men. I don't know how many sharks, maybe a thousand. I know how many men, they averaged six an hour. On Thursday morning, Chief, I bumped into a friend of mine, Herbie Robinson from Cleveland. Baseball player. Boatswain's mate. I thought he was asleep. I reached over to wake him up. Bobbed up, down in the water just like a kinda top. Upended. Well, he'd been bitten in half below the waist. Noon, the fifth day, Mr. Hooper, a Lockheed Ventura saw us. He swung in low and he saw us... he was a young pilot, a lot younger than Mr. Hooper. Anyway, he saw us and he come in low and three hours later a big fat PBY comes down and starts to pick us up. You know that was the time I was most frightened... waitin' for my turn. I'll never put on a lifejacket again. So, eleven hundred men went in the water; 316 men come out and the sharks took the rest, June the 29th, 1945. Anyway, we delivered the bomb.

srah - Where was class conducted? The food court? Anyway, glad I could help.

Anonymous said...

I would add 'One Crazy Summer' to the list. How can you top Bobcat Goldthwait, John Cusack, and a pre-augmentation Demi Moore as the love interest. You can't, that's how.

kudos on including Donovan's Reef. Great movie.

Micah said...

And it was only $5 at Wal-Mart! The first time I was exposed to that movie was when Jimmy Buffett played clips from it between songs at a concert of his that I went to a few years ago.

I'll tell you how you can beat it: Bobcat Goldthwait, John Cusack, and a post-augmentation Demi Moore. ;)

spydrz said...

Yep, the USS Indianapolis.

We should be discussing why my employer sees fit to celebrate a 17th-century Spanish painter when today is the anniversary of D-Day.

Micah said...

I noticed that, too. Ha ha. Well, not entirely surprising since they didn't celebrate Memorial Day, either (their lame excuse is that they couldn't come up with a dignified modification of their logo; yeah, right).