Happy Burns Night!
Not Robert Burns.
My night will consist of reading some of ol' Robbie's greatest hits and then a dinner of spinach and feta chicken sausage (hey, I defy you to find haggis anywhere in central Ohio), salad, and cheese, with some shortbread and tea for dessert.
Then I'll have a wee nip or two of the Dalmore (alas, I have no Robert Burns scotch) while I puff on my pipe and watch last night's episode of "The Shield." Maybe I'll drift off to sleep to Braveheart or Rob Roy.
Or maybe I'll screw all of that and watch some porn.